The college wants to learn more about you, not one of your friends or one of your relatives
The college wants to learn more about you, not one of your friends or one of your relatives
It should be your story that can come from only you
It should not be a story the student sitting next to you can tell, and the person next to them, and the person in the high school in the next town, or the next state…
Some of the best essays – the memorable and unusual ones – are very focused
It should not be the story of your life, but a small glimpse of it, one that is rich with meaning and alive with imagery
Essays about your family, your trip to France, or your extracurricular activities, can be effective as long as they are focused and specific!
For example:
A single Christmas Eve mass or Yom Kippur service
A meal of boiled tongue in Strasbourg
One day of scooping ice cream at Lime Rickeys
Develop your main idea with vivid and specific facts, events, and examples
Develop your main idea with vivid and specific facts, events, and examples
There's a big difference between simply stating a point of view and letting an idea unfold in the details:
Boring and Generic: "I like to be surrounded by people with a variety of backgrounds and interests."
Much Better: "During that night, I sang the theme song from Casablanca with a baseball coach who thinks he's Bogie, discussed Marxism with a little old lady, and heard more than I ever wanted to know about some woman's gall bladder operation."
Avoid clichéd, generic, and predictable writing by using vivid and specific details
Avoid clichéd, generic, and predictable writing by using vivid and specific details
Boring and Generic: "I want to help people. I have gotten so much out of life through the love and guidance of my family. I feel that many individuals have not been as fortunate; therefore, I would like to expand the lives of others."
Much Better: "My Mom and Dad stood on plenty of sidelines 'til their shoes filled with water or their fingers turned white, or somebody's golden retriever signed his name on their coats in mud. That kind of commitment is what I'd like to bring to working with fourth-graders."
Any factual errors in the essay will reveal that you really haven't thought deeply about your choice
Any factual errors in the essay will reveal that you really haven't thought deeply about your choice
Don't repeat information that is found elsewhere in the application
Don't repeat information that is found elsewhere in the application
Your essay will end up sounding like an autobiography, resume, travelogue, or laundry list. Yawn.
Don’t mention your GPA or SAT / ACT scores in your essay
For example, DON’T say this:
"During my junior year, I played first singles on the tennis team, served on the student council, maintained a B+ average, traveled to France, and worked at a cheese factory."
Short sentences are more forceful because they are direct
Too Many Words:“Over the years it has been pointed out to me by my parents, friends, and teachers—and I have even noticed this about myself, as well—that I am not the neatest person in the world.”
Much Better:“I'm a slob.”
If your essay says any (or all!!) of the below, TAKE THEM OUT:
If your essay says any (or all!!) of the below, TAKE THEM OUT:
cutting edge
I learned my lesson
I always learn from my mistakes
I know my dreams will come true
I can make a difference
_________ is my passion
I no longer take my loved ones for granted
These lessons are useful both on and off the field (or other sporting arena)
Remember: Good writers use the best words, not the biggest words.
Write an essay, not an e-mail
Write an essay, not an e-mail
Slang terms and an excessively casual tone should be eliminated
No LOLs, LMAO, BTW…
Avoid words such as: very, a lot, cool, awesome and nice
Don’t write: “I can’t wait to wear a Villanova sweatshirt…” in an essay to Saint Joseph’s. Oops!
It can miss spelling errors like the ones below:
It can miss spelling errors like the ones below:
"After I graduate form high school, I plan too work for a nonprofit organization during the summer." Oops!
"From that day on, Daniel was my best fried." Oops! I hope Daniel wasn’t fried!
Let’s get started!
Let’s get started!
Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what lessons did you learn?
Reflect on a time when you challenged a belief or idea. What prompted you to act? Would you make the same decision again?
Describe a place or environment where you are perfectly content. What do you do or experience there, and why is it meaningful to you?
Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal, that marked your transition from childhood to adulthood within your culture, community, or family.
College Board gives great tips about writing a college essay. It also offers critiques of sample essays.
College Board gives great tips about writing a college essay. It also offers critiques of sample essays.
