The purpose of this essay is to correct our mistakes and improve our skills of writing essays. Furthermore, we will follow some guidelines to help us to provide a good peer review. This peer review will offer strong and weak points in Ahmed’s essay.
Ahmed’s essay talked about Ahmed's dream. The essay has a wonderful description similar to watching Hollywood movies. In addition, there are strong links between sentences. They made the essay strong and easy for any reader. Because he wrote it by different way, it attracts me. Moreover, the thesis has a good tie with the topic sentences. In fact, thesis flows smoothly in the essay
The beauty has never been completed. The essay has a weak point need to deal it, although the essay is a strong and beauty. Is that the writer sometimes ignore the punctuation marks or he write them in wrong place such as " I have to dedicate myself to my studies and, …" . in fact, the punctuation marks always change the meaning of sentences, so have to focus on them.
To conclude, I would like say again Ahmed is a good writer and his essay has many aspect of beauty. Also because he offers evidences and details in each paragraph, so the paragraphs are proportionately balanced. Even his conclude is giving the essay a sense of completeness, and leave a final impression on the reader and his dream. Ahmed, focus on the punctuation marks that's all.