Name “My Golden Apple”

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“My Golden Apple”

Start-up Essay

Focus Correction Areas:





______/ 10 Points

* Organizes the essay into logical arranged paragraphs. Places details
* leads into a clear thesis statement and establishes an ordered plan of development logically and effectively

*Generally organizes the essay into paragraphs
* contains a vague thesis statement and presents an incomplete or unclear plan of development

* Does not use paragraphs or does so inconsistently. Paragraphs have no relationship to organizational structure of text
* . Elements of the introduction, such as an attention getter or plan of development, are missing.

______ 15 points
( 5 points per paragraph)

  • Uses thesis driven topic sentences followed by consistent supporting information. Essay paragraphs remain focused and clear and end with a creative clinching sentence.

  • Topic sentences have only a vague relation to the essay prompt. Supporting details are inconsistent or slightly off topic. Clinching sentences may not be used.

  • Fails to include a deliberate topic sentence. Supporting details have no relationship with the topic sentence.


______ 30 points

(10 pts per paragraph)

  • At least two or three specific details and examples clearly and purposefully used to support the writer’s claims.

  • Includes fresh and original ideas. The essay goes beyond the obvious or predictable and tells the reader something new.

  • One or two details or examples are used to support the writer’s claim. These examples may be too general or broad, or may only weakly support the writer’s position.

  • Some supporting examples or ideas are repetitive.

  • Presents an insufficient number of examples. Examples given do not support the essay’s position.

  • The essay is predictable. It contains only basic summary material and little original thinking.

May repeat same ideas often; collection of ideas may seem random


______ 5 pts

  • Uses correct grammar that adds clarity and style.

  • Punctuates correctly; guides reader through text.

  • Has errors in grammar or usage, but they are not serious enough to distort meaning.

  • Places terminal punctuation correctly; makes some errors with internal punctuation.

  • Has noticeable grammatical errors that affect or distort meaning of text.

* Makes several mistakes in punctuation

Total Points: ____ / 60


Assignment: Write an essay to nominate a teacher that you have had for the prestigious “Golden

Apple Award,” which is awarded to a great teacher. Your essay should be five or

more paragraphs. Provide at least three strong reasons (1 per paragraph) that

clearly show why your nominated teacher deserves this award. For each reason, provide 2-3

elaborations. Your reason should identify the qualities or characteristics that make this person a special teacher.

Purpose: To nominate a special teacher for the “Golden Apple Award” and to show why this

teacher is deserving of the award.
Audience: The “Golden Apple Award” nomination committee
Form: A 3-part persuasive essay (intro. – body – conclusion) of 5+ paragraphs
Content: Intro: Introduce your teacher (who s/he is, what s/he teaches, and in

general 3+ reasons why they deserve the award.)
Body: Each paragraph gives one general reason with 2+ elaborations
Conclusion: Reviews why the person is deserving. Ends with a strong statement

of nomination.

Sample Format

James Dean

Eff. Wr. 2B

Sept. 1, 20__


Dear Golden Apple Selection Committee,
Once in everyone's life we should be touched by a teacher who truly makes a
difference, who can ignite a passion for learning, who can unlock the doors to discovery,
or who instills a belief in possibilities. I was blessed with such a teacher, Mrs. Diana
Dogood. Mrs. Dogood is more than deserving of this award for three reasons: she inspires
students to learn; she makes learning fun; and she cares for her students as individuals.
It is with great pleasure that I nominate Mrs. Dianna Dogood for the Golden Apple Award.


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