Joseph M. Camhi
English 28, Section 0265
31 August 2016
Hunting is when you search for animals and kill them. Though Bambi may have been a cute Disney cartoon, imagine how much better he would look on your plate with a little bit of catsup and alot of red wine. Lets face it venison is refined crude deer. Deer are pointless. Sure the deer is pretty coming out of the woods (if they don’t destroy your car) but they are far more pretty coming out of the oven, and they also smell a lot better too. In addition, they don’t fit in your fish tank, they won’t wear leashes, and they’d surely stink up the litter box (obviously, they are not as dainty or as subtle as cats). Contrary to Mr. Disney’s propaganda they really can’t act and they never break into song. It’s more than likely that when you do kill Bambi’s real mother, or Rudolph, or Dancer, or Prancer; Bambi, being a non-thinking animal, doesn’t know and doesn’t grieve as he starves to death. It’s more better to also kill Bambi, to thin out the crowd and put the weak ones out of their misery. Some say, don’t kill the pretty deer, have a heart, but after I shoot it and slit it’s majestic throat, I say, “I got a hart.” Hunting is good.
Hunting is good. Hunting thins out the heard. Hunting is not only good for the hunter, it is also good for the hunted. It is good to hunt to get rid of the excess dear. If hunters didn’t hunt, it would not be as good for the dear. When people get old, they move to Florida. But what can deer do? They can starve to death, that’s what they can do. So when you shoot an old deer it is good that they are not starving to death. Old people get Medicare, but old deer are not as lucky, and that is why you have to shoot them.
In today’s society, some people say don’t hunt. These people are bleeding hearts from the the Northeast. They are women or they are like women. Woman are strangely attracted to pretty things that guys like me could care less about, like deer, or candles. For example, I remember driving my girlfriend all over Lafayette, Louisiana. We’d walk into every restaurant and she’d reject it. Was it food? No way. She just wanted a place with candles at the table. All I wanted was a TV at the bar so I could sneak glances at the game while pretending to be admiring her. She also likes deer. We didn’t find candles, but I did find a place that serves venison.
It is evident that hunting is good because the law says how many deer you can hunt. The right amount to hunt is six deer per season. Here in Louisiana you are allowed to shoot one buck and one doe per season.
Hunting is good because it is our traditional way of life. Father’s like bringing their sons hunting. I remember the first time I went hunting with my father. I saw the deer standing their. It was a beautiful day. My father said shoot it. I told him I didn’t want to. He said, “What are you, one of them girls from the Northeast?” I said that I wasn’t. He said, “Shoot the deer or we don’t eat dinner.”
I said, “No.”
“Yes,” he said and he slapped me in the head. I took the gun and aimed. The deer was shot, it fell, and then I threw up. Hunting brings families close together.
Society needs hunting because their would be too many deer. Too many accidents occur when their are too many deer. It is no picnic to hit a deer with your car. Hitting a deer would turn blue sky gray, but hunting makes me as happy as pie. Hunting is good.